@mrtruthandsoul: How much of this "no more tears" shampoo do I have to feed this baby to get it to stop crying?
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@TwatWaffler69: You think you're going to win this? I've been acting out potential fake arguments in the shower for years. You don't stand a chance.
@batkaren: KID: *falls out of tree* I'm fine ADULT: *sleeps on neck a little strangely* I have to turn my whole body to look at you for the next week
@causticbob: Windows: "You may be the victim of software counterfeiting" no Microsoft,it is you who is the victim of software counterfeiting here, not I
@chuuew: Me: I'd invite you in but my place is a mess Friend: That's OK. I don't mind M: The mess tho F: Don't be silly M: I don't want u in my house