@1Happytwit: HR said I'm not allowed to try to hang co-workers with an extension cord. Dunno what I'm supposed to use though, they wouldn't tell me.
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@Reverend_Scott: COP: Know why I stopped you? MAN IN A RESTAURANT EATING FRIED CHICKEN: Huh? COP: You're using a knife and fork. Step away from the chicken
@Crutnacker: Biden: Told Trump about Carter's ghost in the West Wing Obama: Carter is still alive Biden: He doesn't know that
@TheBoydP: *Wife sends me a link* *I click on link* *Buy whatever's at the link* *wait for delivery* ~Christmas shopping for my wife