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@StaceyShortcake: The last time I was 100% sure about a decision was in 3rd grade, and that box of 64 crayons with the built in sharpener didn't disappoint.
@weirdralph: My son keeps running around naked, so I sprayed him with Windex. It's supposed to prevent streaking.
@JermHimselfish: I need to hire someone to follow me around and abruptly drag a needle across a record every time that I enter a room.