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@Flora__Flora: How does the little mermaid decide which creatures are her friends and which ones are her bra
@ObscureGent: My daughter says she saw a demon in her room. I'm tweeting this from the safety of my office wishing her a lot of luck.
@XplodingUnicorn: Wife: Don't tweet that Me: *thinks about it* Wife: I'll divorce you Me: *thinks harder* Wife: And give you all 4 kids Me: *hits delete*
@Bez: I could be a stripper if guys want to see a girl get stuck trying to take off her turtleneck followed by an on-stage panic attack.