@JohnHilsen: Humans are 58% water. Jellyfish are 95% water. Therefore, humans are 61% jellyfish.
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@ScubavelliDeux: *whispers seductively in your ear* "...look at that last slice of pizza and you're dead to me..."
@EndhooS: [1st day undercover] Me: [to gang of street punks] what up dongs? Voice through earpiece: OMG its DAWGS u idiot Me: is ur gang hiring today?