@bopinklady: Husband is leaning dangerously out of window whilst he cleans it. Only thing stopping me from shoving him out is that he cleans the windows
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@Tharin_P: "What do missiles, camels, and common fetishes have in common?" "...What?" " -Toes." "Out. Just get out."
@angelunatic_: Picture me and my boyfriend on a dinner date Wrong We're sitting on the same side of the table making you uncomfortable
@LizHackett: Keen silence from a dinner guest as she looks across the living room and realizes I made her bridesmaid dress into a dog bed.
@rickkondell: The plural of beer is beer, which is very convenient when you are explaining to your wife why you were late coming home from work.