@Jandalize: I accidental typed sinroof instead of sunroof and I may have just invented the greatest thing ever.
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@kelkulus: My girlfriend and I are celebrating our anniversary tonight by breaking up six years ago.
@AmericanGent69: Facebook Friend: I woke up at 3:30am so I could sneak in a 8 mile run. Me: I skipped showering so I could sleep an extra 15 minutes.
@cuckoo_cachu: Husband has fake roaches that he sets up around the house to scare the shit out of me 24/7. I'm putting out positive pregnancy tests. HA.
@mortimermaiden: The soft snowflakes swirling in the night sky remind me of the time mom had too much gin and threw a roast duck at dad for taking her youth.