@AZHORSEMOM77: I act really tough for a person who spent $40 on cookies I dont like because a girl scout was crying
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@msdanifernandez: *conducting job interview* And what would you say your biggest weakness is? Other than that haircut.
@KattsDogma: Meghan Trainor songs: -All About That Bass -Flounder's Good Too -Also I Like Shrimp -Wait, I'm a Vegan -All About That Kale
@KalvinMacleod: WIFE: Where are the groceries? ME: Bacon was on sale. WIFE: Oh god, what does that mean? *sound of dump truck backing into driveway*