@liv_thatsme: I always bring 2 pop tarts to work, so I can eat one now and the other one also now.
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@KaylarWill: It's a shock to me that people actually pay their student loans. That's a bill I gave to Jesus
@Elephart: When my wife forgets to fill up the fishtank I lower the ceiling a few inches every day until she remembers.
@UnicornSyrup: Anyone who says their wedding day was the best day of their life, has never had 2 candy bars fall down at once from a vending machine.