@TommyKarate: I always buy a Get Well Soon card for the couple who invites me to their wedding.
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@Ristolable: Guy on fb posted a picture of his baby w/ the caption "1st Easter!" Hell no, there have been like 2000, we're not starting over just for him
@SCbchbum: If you want to hear an elderly couple arguing for 2 hrs about whether they closed their garage door, go to a movie at 11AM on a weekday.
@coketruck76: *Pearly Gates St. Peter: No way! Me as angel: It's the rules! SP: But the drugs and sweari- M: ALL DOGS GO TO HEAVEN! Snoop: Fo' Shizzle.