@Baz_3000: I always read my wife's Horoscope to see what kind of day I'M going to have.
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@SlabBaconBP: I find that the secret to not being insecure is to just be better than everybody at everything while being incredibly good looking.
@ilovepie84: The best way to see if someone is telling the truth is to tie them to a chair and start up the ol chainsaw.
@WilliamAder: Surprised Scarlett Johansson didn't leg sweep Travolta, throw him over her should onto his back and put her foot on his throat.
@nerdreign: Some days it's little things, the tone of his voice or his words when we're alone, that help me realize I'd rather have the insurance money.