@Sean_Burgundy_: I always try to hold in my sneezes so I don't give someone a reason to talk to me
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@heidi420x: You have to PAY for a speeding ticket?! I thought it was a reward for beating other drivers..
@jimmytorosian: *Buys map of world, pins it up on wall* *Throws dart, swears to visit wherever it lands* *Visits the middle of the Atlantic Ocean*
@WilliamAder: My second account is trying to drive a wedge of suspicion between me and my Twitter crush.
@KKAlThani: Pretty cool how your dreams went from "Astronaut" or "Doctor" to "What's the lowest I can get to pass this course"