@Dawn_M_: I am a woman, hear my eyes roll.
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@MsFoxIfUrNasty: There are so many songs that tell us how to breathe. It's like musicians and songwriters have never heard of the autonomic nervous system.
@withanewname: *installs google translate* *looks at Arabic tweets for jokes to steal* *finds half my tweets doing better than mine*
@BrandonVine: *pulled over by cop* Cop: Did you know that your tags are expired? *tags cop* Me: You're it! Cop: Me running away: Renewed!
@PaperWash: date: and then after traveling to Iceland I decided to get my MBA me: date: me: I went to Arby's 7 times yesterday