@dril: i am developing a ground brekaing new app called "MOneyWallet", where you earn "Money Points" by mailing cash to my house
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@Cheeseboy22: We reach out to meet each other half way, filling the vast void between us. We yearn to become as one." - A poem by my eyebrows
@brendohare: On your first day of prison, go up to the biggest, scariest guy there, and ask him "Have you heard of updog?"
@internetluke: [showing my family to coworker] This is a picture of my daughter & my cat. Mittens & Jack. "You named your daughter Jack?" Nope, mittens