@Matt_The_1st: I applied for a loan from the U.S. Government, but was turned down because I had a legitimate repayment plan
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@hinnaz: Brazone : when a woman wants you to always support her, but gets rid of you the moment she is home and comfortable.
@mattgallo123: The only thing more shocking than finding water on planet Mars would be finding me in Planet Fitness.
@TheToddWilliams: [butterfly residence] WIFE: You said you'd change, Carl HUSBAND: But I have WIFE: Not really HUSBAND: Uh…I used to be a fricken caterpillar
@PaperWash: 4 y/o: how does Santa go to everyone's house in one night me: warp speed 4 y/o: warp speed isn't real me: neither is Santa go to sleep