@StellaRtwot: I appreciate when aerobic instructors say "Don't forget to breathe" because I sometimes forget and then I die.
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@arielleBigBlue: If I could, I would avoid every conversation by making that beeping truck sound while slowly backing away from people as they approach me.
@Up2Long: 17 yo didn't do chores last night. I delete all songs on iPod and replace them with the theme song to Scooby Doo. Enjoy the bus to school.
@AnOrangeSNES: [Standing still for a picture] I guess you can say I'm *turns around for a second and the camera goes off* not good at posing for pictures.
@michaelianblack: How come my wife can't hold her bladder for more than three hours but she can hold a grudge for fourteen years?