@The_MartiniGirl: I am not that kind of woman...I"m much worse.

@Ramitology: "PS, I love you" -- Me to my PlayStation.

@i_Lean: My boyfriend calls me "babe" because "pig in the city" is such a mouthful to say.

@BuckyIsotope: OLD MAN: I fought in WWII ME: Oh yeah? What was your kill:death ratio OLD MAN: what ME: Can you rocket jump? OLD MAN: I wish Hitler had won

@MummsThaWord: Kids want a dog, told em I can only keep 4 things alive, them & the plant. If we add a dog something will die & I cant be sure its the plant