@Mothpete: I bet if Aquaman and Jesus had a fight, Jesus would walk all over him.
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@daemonic3: WAITER: Ready to order? ME: First, I'd like to hear the chef's special WAITER: Oh yes he's very special [chef in background sheds a tear]
@junejuly12: *eats Big Mac meal* *has two ice cream cones for dessert* *drives by gym* *wonders why new diet and fitness plan isn't working*
@sarcasm_inc: -THAR SHE BLOWS *she stops* Does he REALLY have to be in here? "My seeing-eye pirate? Yes" But this is so intima- "Fill the balloons, Susan"