@Fred_Delicious: I bet Lincoln is looking down like "dude, trust me, that is not a bad night in a theater"
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@Parentpains: The only standards I have in life are about the quality of alcohol I consume, and even that gets sketchy after about 5 drinks.
@CulturedRuffian: Her: I like long walks on the beach. Me: Is there WiFi? Her: Where? Me: The beach. Her: What?...No. Me: We should see other people.
@rockymomax: ME: long time no see! I heard you're a doctor FRIEND: I am. what do you do now? ME: [glances down at open twitter app] I'm a writer
@Elizasoul80: The lack of proof that Robert Downey Jr is stalking me just convinces me that he is very good at it.