@rolldiggity: I bet other insects hate it when they ask a caterpillar how she became a butterfly, and she's all, "Just diet and exercise, guys!"
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@Thedudish: Hey, remember me from last night? You gave me the wrong number but I found you on Facebook. I'm on your porch. Can I come in?
@JohnLyonTweets: *walks into alma mater carrying English degree* I'd like a refund, please. This did not work as promised.
@MarkusJ: finally, the ants are going to rise up and claim their rightful place as masters of this wretched planet
@Boleyngirly: My daughter just announced she's SICK of stupid-ass people. I said "Oh darlin, you're gonna feel ill for a long time.. they're everywhere."