@Weird_Rash: I blame our unhappy marriage on my wife mostly because of her poor choice in men.
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@Bry_Mac: An interracial couple eating Cheerios and non-English speakers drinking Coke. We're a Benghazi pizza commercial away from a Texas secession.
@Slims_Ramblings: Confidence should never be confused with arrogance. Arrogance is spelled way differently.
@NervousJr: Whenever you're feeling really bad about yourself just remember, there's people that pay money to exercise.
@iwearaonesie: me: How long are you going to keep throwing that in my face?! Netflix: Because you watched "The Wedding Planner"