@MichaelGoffLA: I bought one follower just to see what it was like and he showed up at my job and his name is Eddie and he’s kind of freaking me out guys.
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@Donna_McCoy: I turn my phone off overnight. A 3am text either means bad news or drunk people, and both make more sense in the morning.
@nice_mustard: *on time travel bus* oh you're going back to kill hitler? uh yeah totally, me too *pulls jacket over spice girls world tour '98 t shirt*
@iGreenMonk: Annoucement: At my funeral, all my tweets shall be recited. I will then haunt whomever leaves first, demanding honest feedback for eternity.