@_Tempo11: I buy reverse osmosis filtered alkaline water for my dog and he prefers to drink out of the lake.
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@slennonhugs: I'm a simple man *bites a pinecone* I enjoy simple things *tosses a gun into a lake* that's why I decided to let these bees live in my skull
@too_chihuahua: "How much are these glasses?" "$150 sir" "I guess you could say" *puts on sunglasses* *runs out without another word*
@iwearaonesie: *sees cars lined up outside church* wife: Is that a funeral or a wedding? me: What's the difference?