@Darlainky: I buy seedless grapes because let’s leave the grape growing to the vineyards.
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@jonnysun: CANADIAN: im a canadian DATE: cool i've never met a comedian befor CANADIAN: [is too polite to corect them, dedicates entire life to comedy]
@ThugRaccoons: Wife: *angry; flings wine onto "dinner guest"; storms out of room Me: *consoles visibly upset raccoon
@WheelTod: Saw a standup duo last night. One totally died on stage. The other killed. Actually, now I think about it, it might have been a cage fight.