@mishakey: I can tell a police officer is gay by the way he writes me a ticket instead of letting me off with a warning.
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@tehaveragejoel: "every family has that one huge weirdo" "NOT MY FAMILY!" I shout as I quickly exit the room, my six ducks on leashes in hot pursuit.
@PhoenixRises69: Kate on Facebook can't believe the ordacity of some people. I can't believe the audacity of people who use big words that they can't spell.
@matsmoustache: I don't even understand Fantasy Football. There are no Dragons, Wizards, or hot ass Elven chicks. I call bullshit.