@dmc1138: I can't believe these kids at this lemonade stand expect me to provide my own vodka.
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@caliluvgirl77: coworker: did you hear someone used all the charity money to buy snacks from the vending machine me: *laughing nervously* that's awful
@FrogAvalanche: Drug Dealer: U have to tell me if ur a cop. Cop: U have to tell me if ur a dealer. DD: U sure? Cop: Ya Im a cop, I know laws Oh damn it.
@Merman_Melville: Why doesn't anyone put the whole football on their mouth like a pelican and pretend they don't have it