@DothTheDoth: I can't wait for the stage of capitalism where we have to watch a 15 second advertisement before we remember a memory.
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@WilliamAder: Whoever gets the gift from me that has scissors under the wrapping paper, I'm going to need those back.
@MiahSaint: This Kit Kat commercial is making some awfully big assumptions about both my generosity and number of friends.
@toujours_fab: My husband said he needs to have sex and now he is mad at me. Apparently, asking 'with each other' was the wrong response.
@SamDelanche: My boss just asked if I'm illiterate, which is offensive because I know exactly who my father is.