@J_Illunninati: I can't wait til my kids become adults so I can go over their houses & throw clean laundry all over the floor.
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@InternetHippo: BEN CARSON’S WIFE: Are you coming home for dinner BEN CARSON: Go to ben carson dot com and read my plan to come home for dinner
@neonwario: What did Mozart say to the police clerk? "I'll be Bach" hahaha. What do you mean they're different people
@kevinseccia: Just hit a racist with my car. Probably a racist. I feel like he was. Statistically, very likely. Oh so you think there's no racism problem?