@CherBear162: I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now.
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@Reverend_Scott: And on the 8th day, God created atheists and said, "Oh man, you're not gonna believe this."
@Dutch_50: Headline: "Russian Jet Shot Down by Turkey" My 1st thought was, "Holy shit the bird has gone Rambo." I must have Thanksgiving on my mind.
@WilliamAder: My wife's returning today after an 8-day trip, so I should probably dampen the kitchen sponge and re-position it.