@GBRougecity: I don't believe in reincarnation but damn my dog looks like he's trying to crank over a motorcycle while he's sleeping.
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@SirEviscerate: *accidentally uses flash while trying to take pic of funny looking person on the bus* ... *makes distant thunder noises with mouth*
@AHundredElbows: [home late] Where were you? "Uh, with my.. gf?" Gf? Well, tell us about her! What's her name? [commercial on tv] uh.. Lisa.. Brandnewtoyota
@ch000ch: *hitler leans in close to the mic* and the next person to question me gets executioned *grammar nazi bites lip*