@MakesYouGiggle: I don't draw my eyebrows on because I can't commit to one facial expression. What if I see a puppy? What if my house burns down?
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@kelkulus: Pot smokers like to say it's safe because it's natural. Other safe natural things include sunburn, poison ivy, and being eaten by a bear.
@JKNenagh: Policeman:"Sir, we have sufficient evidence to believe that this vehicle has been stolen. Me: how Policeman: Step out of the tank Sir
@Darlainky: Instead of asking "Are you still watching?" Netflix just said "Hey, pace yourself, we're almost out of shows."