@samalmightysam: I don't like to brag about going to expensive places, but I just went to the gas station.
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@mollymcnearney: Woman cut me off, stole my parking spot. I honked, flipped her off and went into yoga. Woman came into class as the instructor. Namaste.
@JPHaddadio: Last year I ate out alone on Valentine's Day. To avoid embarrassment, I yacked the whole time with a lovely couple the next table over.
@NotThatKristi: If I was a funeral director, I'd tell everyone "I'll see you later" & then wink, because it's fun to freak people out.