@mattZillaaaa: I don't mean to brag but I've perfected the confused look whenever my credit cards get declined
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@illiter8too: Murder is justifiable if it's against a person who calls you and hands their phone off to another person with whom you didn't wish to speak.
@stephenjmolloy: Doctor: "Well, Mrs Jones, you are eating for two now!" Kate: "I'm pregnant?!" Doctor: "No. You have a tapeworm."