@jjlob7: I don't need a personal trainer as much as I need someone to follow me around and slap unhealthy food out of my hands. :/
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@FXTVaddict: Me: I asked the waitress for diet Coke and she thought I said rum and Coke. Boss: 5 times? Me: Yeah I guess. B: ..... M: HR again?
@leshnevsky: - How can you always be such a happy person? - I never argue with people. - That's impossible! - You're right! That's impossible.
@Pork_Chop_Hair: Instead of butterfly kisses, I give you moth kisses. They're crazy, frantic, all over the place- and quite honestly, you're terrified.