@meganamram: I don't need to watch the debates, I read a bumper sticker the other day that totally convinced me
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@sageboggs: How to Be Good At Twitter 1. don't be 2. don't have that be your goal 3. aim higher 4. seriously, go outside or something
@dorsalstream: ME: Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? DEATH: WE GET THERE WHEN WE GET THERE.
@david8hughes: [wakes up & turns to wife] "I had a nightmare. You died." "Aw. It was just a-" "Let me finish. You died & I had to make my breakfast."
@_making_friends: me: damnit, i forgot to get my bus fare reimbursed this month sally: go see gary in HR, he's pretty flexible [walks in on gary doing yoga]