@Elizasoul80: I don't need WebMD to tell me what's wrong with me, I have my mother.
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@ojedge: WATER POLO INSTRUCTOR: "Are you sure you know what you're doing?" ME: [Adjusting the mask & snorkel on my horse] "Of course I do."
@Jacksawyerr: If I could be any super hero I'd be The Flash, but instead of wearing his costume I'd wear a trench coat. Same name, different purpose.
@BradBroaddus: My wife just opened my car door for me. Would have been a nice gesture had we not been going 70mph.