@Lisa_Laughs_: I don't talk about my ex's because I like to start of with a clean slate. That, and they're dead to me. Well, to everyone, but mostly me.
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@squirrel74wkgn: *kids running down the stairs* DADDY, DADDY, I HEARD TOYS BUZZING IN YOUR ROOM AND MOMMY SAY, "SANTA CAME EARLY THIS YEAR."
@CroweJam: The Humane Society will give Donald Trump $5 if he releases that thing on his head back into the woods.
@jergarl: The year is 2057: Friday the 13th part 573.... Jason finds a fabulous pair of shoes to match his outfit.