@buhsbaby_baby: I feel like auto-correct should know by now that I'd never ask anyone to "jazz" all over my face.
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@RegularFred: I was banned from guitar class because of an inappropriate reaction to "let's practice your fingering technique"
@leslid79: I wear my heart on my sleeve because if I wore it on my chest, it'd just get mustard stains on it.
@Breadery: When we first dated I thought your freckles were dots of inexcusable cuteness. Now I can see how joined up they draw a pentagram.