@KentWGraham: I feel sorry for the Phillip whose head inspired the screwdriver.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Cheeseboy22: My wife took me to the most amazing 3D movie I had ever seen last night. Half way through it I realized: we were at a play.
@petridishes: from Jabba the Hutt's perspective Star Wars is the story of a guy who owed him money and then instead of paying had his friends murder him
@daemonic3: I'm going to run errands, need anything? "Yes, some new light bulbs" Why, our current bulbs are too heavy? "And a good divorce lawyer"
@JoParkerBear: God will never give you more than you can handle, unless you were born in the wrong place or don't have money. That makes God super mad.