@Robert_Beau: I finally had to tell the dog he was adopted.
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@ScottLinnen: Always keep an axe by the front door so I can give the other Jehovah something awesome to witness.
@danjan13: Empty out and clean a mace container. Fill with water Stare into the eyes of your enemies as you spray your own eyes and never blink
@internetluke: A modern recasting of Moses floating down a river in a wicker basket but it's a soccer mom forgetting her baby on the roof of her van.
@TheQuietPsycho: CW: if you repeatedly see a cardinal, it's the spirit of a loved one. I think that's my mom Me: that's nice. Your mom just shit on that guy