@Tmoney68: I find it most unfair that the dentist in this neighborhood hands out toothbrushes for Halloween but the pharmacist doesn't hand out drugs.
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@robfee: Pretty sure airport food was priced by children just learning about numbers. "Ok Brian, how much should this apple cost?" SIXTY TWO DOLLARS!
@pumpkin_horse: *lays down on memory foam mattress* mattress: remember that time you pooped your pants in 3rd grade? me: I regret buying you
@tacos_y_cerveza: CW: Can I ask you something? Me: Don't talk to me until I've had coffee. CW: But you don't drink coffee. Me: *smiles and continues to work