@just1fool: I found a ten dollar bill on the ground once and thought, "This is as good as it's ever going to get. Buy some relish."
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@bazecraze: A National Treasure where Nicholas Cage has to find the model number on a 15 year old dishwasher.
@fro_vo: Interviewer: your resume says you were a waiter Me: yes that's right Interviewer: where at Me: out in the lobby right before this interview
@Los01001111: My Wife does this cute thing where she says that "actions speak louder than words" and then gets pissed at me for just nodding.
@WildeThingy: "I'd like a nice stiff entendre please." - Want me to make it a double? "I'll just take it as it comes."