@RamblingMachine: I hate it when crazy people say Poseidon told them they are the ninja turtles and I don't even remember I told them so.
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@Reverend_Scott: SON: The car's manual suggests not to turn the stereo up all the way. DAD: Guess you could say- SON: NO DON'T- DAD: -that's sound advice.
@ShanaRose21: I can never find my cars keys but I won't forget that time you checked out another woman at the mall four years ago.
@huntigula: Me: If Obi-Wan's clothes remained after Vader killed him, then why wasn't ghost Obi-Wan naked? My date: [to waiter] Check, please.
@KalvinMacleod: Alanis Morissette: It’s like 10000 spoons when all you need is a knife. Spoons R Us clerk: Ma’am, nobody asked you to shop here.