@JermHimselfish: I hate it when I see an inflatable arm-flailing tube man and then I realize that he was actually flailing his arms at someone behind me.
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@QwertyJones3: MY DAD: Foreigners in this country need to learn English. ALSO MY DAD: I heard you got a new hi-bird car.
@Schmoodles: Apparently, when your boss asks you to get a cake for a coworker's 60th birthday, 'cake' is not code for 'stripper.' Live & learn, guys.
@SooInnocentDad: My son and his friends are great ... They always spray the house with air freshener before I get home