@TimJohnish: I hate it when you tell someone a lie to sound interesting and then you have to keep it up for several years because you married them.
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@MartaEffing: Decorating my xmas tree after a bottle of wine. Mixed up a box of candy canes with a box of tampons. Tree looks weird and I feel minty.
@SardonicTart: Me: Wow this recumbent bike is pretty comfortable. Trainer: Ok now start pedaling. Me: What?
@Bunnydurden: I wish mirrors and cameras would get together and figure out what I really look like.