@NotJPo: I hate when I get so stoned that I can barely feel my legs and arms and antlers and wings.
@liberalcannon: My hobbies are scrolling through twitter, charging my phone and being generally dissatisfied with things.
@robdelaney: can I use a minion as a tampon
@dumbbeezie: Time to go to the liquor store, I’m almost out of holiday spirit
@ItsAndyRyan: Now then - what's an oxymoron?
@BoogTweets: Me: *Buys nutribullet* will this baby take down a vegan?
Cashier: No, it's not an actual bu…
Me: *loads nutrigun*
Cashier: What the heck?