@Tups13: I hate when I think of a great tweet and discover someone did it already. It's like that time I invented the wheelbarrow.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Just_Lee_: When I think of you, I touch myself. With my finger. In the back of my throat to help me vomit because you make me nauseous.
@GloriaFallon123: A woman told me at dinner she liked me because I'm "not afraid to eat bread"--so I'm done with socializing for at least a year thanks
@XplodingUnicorn: If you still had hope for kids today, a teenager in a bookstore pointed to a book title and asked me if it was about World War Two or Eleven