@kcmoore51: I hate when my wife says her friend at work "got flowers again today" and I have to kill that chick's husband.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KalvinMacleod: It's important to teach your children math so they can better understand what episode of Star Wars they are watching.
@david8hughes: [describing criminal to sketch artist] No, he could speak more languages than that. He had racist shoulders. His front teeth were impatient.