@weinerdog4life: I hate when people talk to me while I'm using the restroom, the other day, this guy was all like "Sir this is a display model at Home Depot"
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MrLloydSpandex: A woman just dropped a £10 note next to me. I thought, 'What would Jesus do?', so I turned it into wine. I bought wine.
@AaronFullerton: Excited for the return of Game of Thrones. Not excited for the return of the phrase, "If you'd read the books, you'd know that..."