@tastefactory: I have a clear conscience until a police car pulls behind me. Then I'm like "OH GOD WHAT IF I MURDERED SOMEONE DID I MURDER SOMEONE"
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@LuckoftheDraw86: *hands you baby* Here's your Christmas present I got it at the mall but it didn't come with a gift receipt & people may be looking for it.
@shkeeber: I would never take candy from a stranger, but I'd probably follow a trail of bacon straight into the back of a windowless white van.
@OVO_Ty15: Do we really have to hear Adam Levine talk about how he used to have acne problems? That poor guy.. how'd he ever survive.
@saucy_peaches: HR writing an email saying I'm a naughty girl is not an acceptable excuse to not take awareness training... Apparently